Monday 7 May
Great news on the foreign front! Sarkozy was defeated in the French Presidential election! He may call himself a center right leader, but he has betrayed his country of birth (Hungary), and we won’t forget that his party did not support us in the European Parliament. Adieux Monsieur Sarkozy!
The Greek general election was also inconclusive, so it looks like our own fiscal problems will once again be overshadowed by the Greeks. Perhaps God is looking favorably on Hungary once again.
Tuesday 8 May
The anti-corruption political party LMP (Politics can be different) are causing me a few problems at the moment. Their leader Gergely Karácsony has been asking embarrassing questions in Parliament about why a company owned by my school pal Lajos Simicska is winning so many government contracts. Karácsony is also asking about the land deals, in which the state has leased agricultural land to some of my friends for twenty years at rents that are below the amount of subsidies that my friends will receive from the E.U.
This is very embarrassing, because I won the election by painting the former government as being totally corrupt. I hoped that my own cronyism would go unnoticed. It seems that the controls that I introduced over the media have been insufficient!
I decided to appeal to the xenophobia that unites the Fidesz supporters. “Why shouldn’t we have a few Hungarian millionaires?” I shouted. “Why wait until foreigners have stolen all that we have?”
I think that our supporters will agree that if anyone is going to steal our money, it is better that they are Hungarian!
Wednesday 9 May
The cabinet discussed the new tax laws today. As is our policy, we have levied additional taxes on the foreign owned banks and telecom companies. Our plan is that eventually these companies will leave Hungary. Then we can replace them with companies owned by Hungarian businessmen. Already we have plans for a new mobile phone company, Fid-Tel. I can’t disclose who the owners are.
Friday 10 May
I am reshuffling the cabinet. The central part of the reorganization is the creation of a three man junta, reporting directly to me, with unlimited powers. The junta will be headed by Lázár János, who will be responsible for robbing foreign owned corporations.
As Mayor of Hódmezővásárhely, János made a lot of money by speculating on the foreign exchange markets, using city government funds. Then last year, his bets went wrong, and he lost a huge amount of the city’s money. So he went to the foreign owned bank that he had made the bets with and demanded that they cancel his loss making contracts. They naturally refused, so he told them that he would ensure that the laws of the country are changed to force them to repay the money that they have stolen from the good people of Hódmezővásárhely. I like this attitude, and it will be useful in our fight against foreign imperialist capitalism.
I decided that finance minister György Matolcsy should continue in his job. The economic situation in Hungary is looking uncertain, and it’s important that we have continuity – that is, one man who can be used as a scapegoat if it all goes wrong.
Tamás Fellegi has stepped down as chief negotiator with the IMF. He has done a fantastic job, sitting in his office for nearly six months, waiting for the negotiations to start.
Monday 14 May
Bad news on the economic front. Our GDP figures for the first quarter of the year were announced today, and GDP has fallen by 0.7%. It would have been worse, but for the fact that this is a leap year, and so there was an additional working day.
Still, we can’t get too depressed by one quarter’s figures, as I tell the journalists every quarter!
FreeHungary; May 16. 2012.