Saturday 18 February

I turned the tables on our European enemies today, make no question. I made a speech accusing Brussels of acting illegally in cutting off the cohesion funds to us!

They question the legality of our actions. We can question the legality of theirs!

Of course my supporters loved it!

Monday 20 February

A nervous day! Parliament was voting on a resolution that we should finally release the secret service files exposing the names of those who acted as informers to the secret police during the communist dictatorship. Had this motion been passed, and the files made public, it would have killed our reputation as the party of patriotic heroes who fought for our country's freedom during those dark days.

I shouldn't have worried- turkeys don't vote for Christmas – and the motion was rejected. Bit odd that all the opposition parties other than Jobbik voted in favour of the motion though!

Tuesday 21 February

Our European enemies are threatening to kick us where it hurts – in the wallet. The EU commission are threatening to cut off the cohesion funds if we don't play ball regarding the budget.

I have to admit I was not expecting this. I really thought they didn't have the balls. They've never done it before. Damn damn damn!!

Thursday 23 February

I had a rather delicate engagement tonight, when I attended the 20th anniversary of the German Business Club. Most of their members have been well and truly shafted by our "special taxes" on foreign multinationals, so I was worried that I would be about as popular as Gyurcsány at a Fidesz rally.

I wrote a patriotic speech about how our two countries had fought side by side against Western oppression during the Second World War. When I showed it to Tibor, he was shocked. "You can't say that!" he said. He then explained to me that Germans are actually not proud of their record during the Second World War. I can't think why.

In the end I wrote a weak speech in which I gave the latest party line: we spent the first 18 months of our term passing a record number of laws, all necessary to get our economy back on track. Not surprising if we made a few mistakes. But we are now working with the EU on correcting those mistakes. What this really means is that we've cocked up and are now doing a huge U turn. I can't admit that though, can I?

FreeHungary; February 29. 2012.